Doin’ the Plan: Trusting in God’s Love and Help

When my youngest son was in kindergarten, I spent one day each week volunteering in his classroom. This allowed me to get to know some of his classmates. One day after school while my son and I were eating lunch, we were discussing one particular little friend of his who was a little bit naughty.

Matter-of-factly, my son assured me, “Don’t worry, Mom. He’ll be good once he’s baptized!”

I paused and then replied, “Well, honey, it doesn’t really work that way.”

My son’s eyes widened as he exclaimed, “What? You mean he’s not doin’ the plan?”

Since then, that little phrase—“doin’ the plan,” made in reference to Heavenly Father’s plan for us—has become something that my husband and I say to one another (usually tongue-in-cheek) when life isn’t going as we’d like it to or when our children are making decisions we don’t necessarily love. “We’re just doin’ the plan!” (Wink, wink!)

But what could “doin’ the plan,” as in the plan of salvation, really mean? In my son’s five-year-old mind, “doin’ the plan” had something to do with obedience and participating in the ordinances of the gospel—not wrong. However, the part he misunderstood was the vital role that agency plays in God’s plan of happiness. We do not become good or righteous just by doing the right things, such as getting baptized; rather, we need to choose to do the right things.

In a talk called “Choose You This Day,” Elder Dale G. Renlund stated:

Our Heavenly Father’s goal in parenting is not to have His children do what is right; it is to have His children choose to do what is right and ultimately become like Him. . . .

. . . Though God wants us to be on the covenant path, He gives us the dignity of choosing.¹

Similarly, the missionary manual Preach My Gospel teaches:

Agency, or the freedom and ability to choose, is an essential part of God’s plan for us. In our premortal life, each of us chose to follow God’s plan and come to earth so we could take the next step in our eternal progression. We understood that while we were here, we would have many new opportunities to grow and experience joy. We also understood that we would face opposition. We would experience temptation, trials, sorrow, and death.

In choosing to come to earth, we trusted in God’s love and help. We trusted in His plan for our salvation.²

Let’s read that again: “In choosing to come to earth, we trusted in God’s love and help. We trusted in His plan for our salvation.”

Brothers and sisters, my prayer today is that we will continue to trust in our Father’s love and help as we “do the plan.” “Our part in this divine plan,” according to President Dallin H. Oaks, “is to trust in God and seek and use these divine helps, most notably the Atonement of His Beloved Son, our Savior and Redeemer, Jesus Christ.”³

Trust in His Love

Sometimes the ability to choose seems daunting or intimidating—particularly in your time of life when you are making so many life-altering decisions. It can feel more like a burden than a blessing. Sometimes we may wish away our agency and long to be told what to do instead of having to figure it out for ourselves.

However, we need to remember that being “command[ed] in all things” (Doctrine and Covenants 58:26) wasn’t our Heavenly Father’s plan! Rather, the plan that Jesus Christ advocated in the premortal existence and that each of us chose to follow was predicated upon the eternal growth we experience as we learn to choose for ourselves.

When I was an undergraduate student at BYU, I had a number of great opportunities to choose from. All were excellent, worthy options, but I felt a lot of pressure to make the “right” choice. I worried that if I didn’t choose correctly, I would “mess up” God’s plan for me. After weeks of feeling unsettled and confused, I devoted a Sunday to fasting and prayer. Still unsure, I called my brother that night and asked him to give me a priesthood blessing. In that blessing, I was given very specific instructions as to what the Lord wanted me to do. This clarity brought me great relief, and I happily trusted and obeyed.

About a year and a half later, I had just graduated with my bachelor’s degree and was beginning a graduate program in dance. During the first few days of the semester, I suddenly got cold feet. I was worried that what I was doing was self-indulgent and impractical. I already had one degree that didn’t have immediate job prospects, and now I was going for another! I visited an advisement office and learned that I could enroll in a postgraduate course of study to get licensure to teach English in secondary education in just one year. This sounded like a more practical choice because it was shorter and had more obvious job prospects.

Once again, I sought a priesthood blessing to help me decide what to do. I was confident that Heavenly Father would once again instruct me on which choice He wanted me to make. However, this blessing went very differently than the previous one. This time I was not told what He wanted me to do. Rather, I was advised that I should choose the one that I felt would make me happiest. This answer came as a big surprise to me, and I actually wasn’t too excited with the counsel because it put the responsibility of choosing back on me. In my disappointment, I also interpreted it to mean that my schooling and future employment didn’t matter to the Lord.

In the years that have passed, I have realized how wrong my reaction was. I was actually given a gift of love and trust that day by a loving parent who wanted me to grow. First, I was given permission to choose what I thought would make me happy without any financial strings attached. Deep down I knew what I wanted to do, but I hesitated to give myself permission to follow my heart. I now see that my Heavenly Father knew me well enough to know what I would choose and that that choice would lead me to this wonderful career. But He wanted me to learn to trust myself and to take ownership of this big decision. It was as if He was saying, “I know what you want, and it’s a good thing. I trust you. Now trust yourself.”

Our Heavenly Father wants us to choose for ourselves, but that doesn’t mean that He doesn’t want to be involved. Instead, His perfect plan made it possible for us to have help in this life. Although we need to learn through disappointment, sorrow, and even failure at times, He can be there to help us avoid some of life’s pitfalls and recover when we fall. From the very inception of His plan, Heavenly Father provided a Savior who would make it possible for us to return to Him even though we would inevitably make mistakes. These mistakes serve a vital purpose: They help us grow, learn, and progress eternally. They can also become an important way we can draw closer to our Father and our Savior and partake of Their love for us.

Recently, my nephew Bryant spoke in church prior to beginning his missionary service. With his permission, I share a part of his talk because I feel that some of you may relate to his experience.

As a freshman here at BYU last fall, Bryant approached his first round of midterms with trepidation. He studied and studied for his first couple of tests, which went, in his words, “surprisingly well.” Relieved, he relaxed a little and decided he didn’t need to study as hard going forward. He got good grades on all of his tests except for one. When he found out his exam score, he was devastated and ashamed. For days he mentally beat himself up, telling himself what a failure he was and how his parents would be so disappointed in him for doing so poorly.

Then one day in his religion class, his professor talked about the power of prayer. Bryant said:

A thought entered my head: Had I asked God to help me with my worries? That thought stuck with me through the rest of that day until at night I knelt down beside my bed and said a prayer. I poured out all of my worries about college and how my parents would react to seeing that score on that test. The moment I ended that prayer, four words entered my head that I will never forget: “Everything will be fine.”

Those words basically became my motto for that year. Whenever I felt terrible or ashamed or worried, those words would come back to my mind. That day changed me. I began to listen more earnestly, paying more attention in my religion class. I began reading my scriptures with the intent to learn rather than as a daily thing to check off. . . . I would focus more on trying to feel the Spirit throughout my day. I was able to really focus on strengthening my relationship with my Heavenly Father.⁴

Bryant expressed gratitude for that test because through it he learned that what is important to him personally—something as small as one exam—was also important to our Heavenly Father because it mattered to Bryant.

At the conclusion of the sacrament meeting, the bishop rose to speak to the congregation. Turning around slightly, he addressed Bryant. “You’re right,” the bishop nodded. “Everything will be fine—when you include the Lord in your plans.”

I love the bishop’s addendum because it gets to the heart of our relationship with our Heavenly Father.

Romans 8:16 says, “The Spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God.” As our Father, God wants to be there to listen, to comfort, to advise, and sometimes to correct us when we get off track. He has given us myriad ways to reach Him and hear Him, such as personal prayer; the words of the scriptures; commandments; covenants that bind us to Him; churches and temples as places of communion; the sacrament; priesthood blessings; Church leaders, including loving bishops and modern-day prophets; and especially the gift of His Spirit.

Have you ever considered that you are so important to Him that He gave you another member of the Godhead, the Holy Ghost, to be your constant companion?

President Russell M. Nelson has said:

I renew my plea for you to do whatever it takes to increase your spiritual capacity to receive personal revelation.

Doing so will help you know how to move ahead with your life, what to do during times of crisis, and how to discern and avoid the temptations and the deceptions of the adversary.⁵

Trust in His Help

Five years ago, at the end of the summer of 2020, my family was eager to attend a niece’s wedding festivities. Because of the COVID-19 lockdown, it had been about five months since we’d seen our family members or done anything exciting outside of our home or yard!

On our way to the wedding reception, we stopped to see the home improvement projects some family members had been working on all summer. Most exciting to two of my sons (who were then ages thirteen and sixteen) was the giant zip line that had been installed in the yard. Now this is no small backyard zip line. It runs down the slope of the mountainside on which our family members live and stands about twenty feet off the ground!

My sister-in-law handed the boys helmets and a harness and gave them instructions at the launching platform. I could see that they weren’t really paying close attention to her—partly because they were so excited but also because they’d ridden zip lines at Scout camp before and didn’t think they needed to listen. However, on the first ride down the zip line, one of them sat in the harness backward, which led to an awkward and uncomfortable ride, if you get my drift.

As they raced back to the platform to ride a second time, the boys were arguing about when and how hard the other should pull the rope—one is cautious, the other is not. I was standing at the platform focused on trying to get them to quit squabbling and to pay attention to how they sat in the harness. With all of the commotion, none of us noticed that my younger son had failed to clip his harness to the zip line before his brother pulled the rope. It wasn’t until he neared the end of the line that he realized the only thing connecting him to the zip line was his own grip.

When you hit the end of a zip line, there can be a pretty violent impact and rebound effect because of the force and the speed at which you’re going. Though my son hung on as tightly as he could, his adolescent arm strength was no match for the impact. He slipped down the rope like Icarus falling from the sky⁶ and fell silently to the ground. All of the worst thoughts I could think of filled my head as I ran screaming over to where he lay motionless. Miraculously, he had landed on some pretty soft ground. Other than having a rope burn on his hands and having the wind knocked out of him, he was unhurt.

As I have reflected on this experience, I have thought about how the boys had everything they needed to have a safe and enjoyable time on the zip line. They had safety equipment, clear instructions, and supervision, yet distractions and a false sense of security prevented their safety and success.

Sometimes life can be a little bit like a zip line: We have been given all the help we need to be successful and safe, but we must choose to accept it. President Thomas S. Monson stated, “Each of us has come to this earth with all the tools necessary to make correct choices.”⁷ Our Father has given us so many ways to stay connected with Him and our Savior, but we have to use our agency to clip onto Them and receive Their divine help. If we leave ourselves to our own strength, we risk our spiritual safety and sometimes suffer unnecessarily.

Likewise, complacent or prideful thoughts discount the need for divine help. These will inevitably lead us to a hard fall. Let us avoid distractions that lead us away from the covenant path and make it hard for us to connect with God and our Savior. I invite you to consider which distractions in your life keep you from an optimal connection with Them. What could you change that would help you hear Them better?

But when we do fall—and we will, because making mistakes is an inevitable part of our mortality—we have the cherished gift of repentance.⁸ Remember, making mistakes is part of “doin’ the plan”! In an act of supreme love, Christ performed an atoning sacrifice so that we might be freed from our mistakes and cleansed from sin. John 15:13 reads, “Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” I testify to you that you are His friend and there is no deeper way to feel the Savior’s love than through the process of repentance! Please do not think that you are out of the reach of His Atonement. Whatever mistakes you have made or whatever perceived imperfections you see in yourself, do not disconnect yourself from Him because you feel inadequate or unworthy of His love! His mercy and grace are infinite. When we “do the plan” with divine help, He works with our imperfections.

One of my assignments at BYU is to direct a performing folk dance company called Traditionz. This ensemble provides outreach performances in elementary and middle schools during spring term. For four weeks, we perform two or three times a day. It’s exhausting, but it’s a lot of fun!

One day a few months ago, we had a three-and-a-half-hour break in the middle of our two shows, which is atypical. While the students were cleaning up their costumes after the first show, I mused on how we would pass the time during the long lunch break. The weather was too chilly to spend several hours outside at a park.

As I was trying to think about what there was to do in the area, I remembered the previous year when we had performed nearby and had gone to the Taylorsville Utah Temple open house. “It’s too bad that we don’t have a temple open house to go to,” I thought. And then I realized, “Wait—there is one going on in Syracuse right now!” I mapped out the distance and, surprisingly, it was only a forty-minute drive there and a twenty-five-minute drive back to our afternoon school. Three-and-a-half hours would be enough time to drive to Syracuse, go through the open house, get some lunch, and drive back to West Valley City for our second show.

As I pitched my idea to the students, there were mixed reactions: Some were excited and immediately cheered, “Yes!” More than a few, though, were concerned about the way we were dressed. You see, the dancers were in casual traveling clothes that consisted mostly of sweats. I had considered this and was appreciative of their desire to show respect for the house of the Lord, but I persisted. “If we had planned for this in advance, we would have dressed up,” I reasoned, “but there actually isn’t an official dress code for an open house. People come dressed in all types of clothing. I think the Lord will understand why we are dressed this way, and He’d rather have us come than stay away. If we don’t go today, we won’t have another opportunity to do this during our tour.”

We put it to a straw poll, and it was decided that we would attend the open house. As we got out of the vans and approached the temple grounds, I could tell that some students were still feeling uncomfortable about their appearance. We got our shoe covers on and proceeded to the front doors, where we were stopped and asked to wait a few minutes for a tour to begin.

Looking across the threshold, I noticed a group of about seven people signing to each other. I glanced over at one of my students, Betsy, who had served an American Sign Language mission and now teaches ASL at the Missionary Training Center, to see if she would try to converse with them. After a moment of visually eavesdropping on their conversation, she realized they needed help. She swiftly stepped over to them and chimed in, “I can interpret!”

We proceeded into the temple with this group and stayed with them all the way through the temple tour with Betsy as their interpreter. My students and I watched her in amazement. Some of my students were grinning. Others, like me, had tears rolling down their cheeks. Betsy’s hands were deftly flying, her face was expressive, and her countenance was radiant as she confidently and beautifully served. Her many years of language study and previous service as an ASL missionary enabled her to speak fluently and with love for the gospel. She was dressed in a pink BYU Dance T-shirt and a pair of black joggers, but that didn’t seem to matter anymore. Any self-consciousness about our casual appearance had evaporated.

One by one, students sidled up to me quietly. “We needed to be here,” they whispered in amazement. “They needed Betsy.”

Unspoken, but in all of our minds, was the thought, “What if we had stayed away because of our appearance?”

And then, audibly, the question came: “How did you know? How did you know we needed to come?”

“I . . . I didn’t,” I stammered. And that was true. I was as amazed as they were! I hadn’t followed what I considered to be a strong feeling or what we might think of as a prompting. It was just an idea of a good thing to do with our time.

At the conclusion of the tour, our group waited outside at a distance as Betsy was thanked and hugged by her new friends. Through tears, they signed, “We know you were sent to help us.” It was at this point that they shared their story with her. They had come from a Deaf branch in Ogden, Utah. Unlike us, they had made an appointment for the open house in advance and had requested that interpretation services be provided for them. However, when they arrived, for some unknown reason there was no one there who could assist them. They were understandably very disappointed. It was at this point that the BYU folk dancers walked up to join the tour.

As Betsy’s new friends departed, the rest of my students waved goodbye and silently cheered for them, many signing, “I love you.” This spontaneous gesture touched my heart because it was so genuine and joyful. We were all just Betsy’s ride, but truly, we all felt enveloped in charity, the pure love of Christ.

I left the temple awestruck and filled with gratitude that I was able to witness this beautiful display of God’s awareness of and merciful love for His children. I knew that God knew Betsy. He knew her unique talents and abilities just as He knew the disappointed hearts of those visitors who were Deaf. In ways I am incapable of understanding with my mortal mind, He was able to bring them together in perfect timing.

Do I know how it happened? No. But what I can attribute part of this miraculous experience to are the prayers we prayed together as a group before embarking on our day. Each morning we asked our Heavenly Father for opportunities to connect with those in our path. We included God in our plans and He, like a master choreographer, provided the design. I, like Nephi, know that

the Lord knoweth all things from the beginning; wherefore, he prepareth a way to accomplish all his works among the children of men; for behold, he hath all power unto the fulfilling of all his words. [1 Nephi 9:6]

In my life, I have had many personal experiences in which I have felt my Heavenly Father’s love for me. He has answered my heartfelt prayers in so many different ways that I know were tender mercies unmistakably meant for me. But often my testimony of His love has grown as I have served others. I have witnessed His hand in their lives and marveled at the ways He shows His love to them. This, in turn, strengthens my faith, and I know that He loves me in this way too. It is what President Nelson defined as “confidence in the Lord” in his recent conference address:

When I speak of having confidence before God, I am referring to having confidence in approaching God right now! I am referring to praying with confidence that Heavenly Father hears us, that He understands our needs better than we do. I am referring to having confidence that He loves us more than we can comprehend, that He sends angels to be with us and with those we love. I am referring to having confidence that He yearns to help each of us reach our highest potential.⁹

“Doin’ the plan” is about reaching our highest eternal potential. My friends, I testify that we can and will feel God’s love for us as we faithfully journey through this mortal life “doin’ the plan.” We can trust in and feel His love as we seek Him, and we can use the abundant help He has given us for our safety and happiness. In trusting in His plan, we can also grow to trust ourselves and our ability to choose wisely. Everything will be fine—when we include Him in our plans. I say these things humbly, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

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