{"id":2274,"date":"2000-11-14T09:38:04","date_gmt":"2000-11-14T16:38:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/speeches.byu.edu\/?p=2274"},"modified":"2023-09-22T08:51:51","modified_gmt":"2023-09-22T14:51:51","slug":"seeking-solutions","status":"publish","type":"speech","link":"https:\/\/speeches.byu.edu\/talks\/mary-ellen-smoot\/seeking-solutions\/","title":{"rendered":"Seeking for Solutions"},"content":{"rendered":"
Brothers and sisters and friends, I am grateful for this opportunity to be here with you. When I visited this campus on another occasion, about 20 years ago, I could not find as good of a parking place as I was given today. I came for Women\u2019s Conference with a car full of friends. After a very inspiring and fulfilling day, I went for the car, thinking I would save the other women the long walk through the parking lot. Imagine how shocked I was when I found my car rendered immobile by a huge contraption on the front wheel. I later learned that the students affectionately called this contraption the \u201cboot.\u201d Our son, a BYU student body officer at the time, had borrowed my car earlier in the semester while his car was being repaired. Unbeknownst to me, in the rush to meet his many obligations on campus, he had parked somewhere he should not have and received a ticket that he had forgotten to pay. I got the boot that day. So believe me, today as I speak with you about seeking solutions to problems, sometimes not even of our own making, I know something about which I speak.<\/p>\n
And I know you do, too. We each have our burdens to bear. No matter who we are, what we do, or where we go, each one of us will have difficulties. Problems are part of mortality. But when solved with wisdom and in accordance with gospel principles, those very problems can be gateways to eternity. As we walk the path of righteousness and turn to the Lord, we come to know the power of God that is within each one of us.<\/p>\n
I want to commend you for how well you are already doing. Your wise decisions and hard work have brought you to Brigham Young University.<\/p>\n
You do so well with such full schedules and heavy loads. I know something of the sacrifices you make to acquire a first-rate education, and I marvel at your strength and abilities. I admire the faithfulness with which you serve in your Church callings. I cheer for you when you put first things first. I have no doubt that you are youth of a noble birthright and that you can live up to the challenges you meet.<\/p>\n
My personal experience has taught me that as you study and prepare to \u201cgo forth to serve,\u201d the most important skill you need to acquire is the ability to solve problems. Individually and as a people, we will make greater progress and do so more joyfully if we focus on solutions rather than problems\u2014whatever the problems may be.<\/p>\n
Today I would like to share four gems of motherly advice regarding problem solving. If at first this counsel seems contrary to your way of thinking, I pray that you will keep an open mind, study it out, and put it to the test\u2014always remembering that \u201cthere is a law, irrevocably decreed in heaven before the foundations of this world, upon which all blessings are predicated\u201d (D&C 130: 20<\/a>).<\/p>\n My first bit of counsel is to stop and consider where you are headed. When faced with a problem, search your soul to see if your present thoughts and actions are leading to a solution, feeding the problem, or possibly even creating more problems for you. You have probably heard the old adage that when you see you are digging yourself into a hole\u2014stop digging! Seek for perspective greater than your own and take an outsider\u2019s look at the situation. In Proverbs we are taught that only \u201cfools despise wisdom and instruction\u201d (Proverbs 1:7<\/a>).<\/p>\n Let me illustrate. When I was about 12 years old, my girlfriend and I were in her barn saddling a horse for a joyride. Suddenly her family\u2019s goose and gander came through the barn door honking and flapping their wings. They were headed right for me, so I started backing away. The geese became even more excited and started pecking at me fiercely. The further I inched away, the madder they got. Mercifully, my friend yelled over the racket, \u201cYou are backing into their nest.\u201d If I had only known that a few moments sooner, I could have walked toward them\u2014away from the problem\u2014and my legs would not have been so black and blue.<\/p>\n I learned an important lesson that day about going in the right direction\u2014and about valuing another\u2019s viewpoint. Sometimes we become convinced that our perceptions are correct, that we are doing all that we can do, or that if we simply run faster or longer our problems will be solved. But nothing will get better if we are going the wrong way. I have discovered a valuable exercise. Occasionally I take a good look at my life, my daily habits, my thoughts, and certainly my actions. Then I ask myself: \u201cAm I headed in the right direction? Will my actions today<\/i> lead to greater peace and happiness tomorrow?\u201d I must be humble enough to realize that I may need to change direction.<\/p>\n Just a few weeks ago, at general conference, Elder Richard G. Scott taught that repentance is an essential element of the gospel\u2014for all of us. \u201cRepentance is not optional\u201d (Richard G. Scott, \u201cThe Path to Peace and Joy<\/a>,\u201d Ensign,<\/i> November 2000, 25). It is part of walking the paths of righteousness. If ever our performance does not adhere to correct and eternal principles, if the path we are traveling is pulling us away from eternal goals, we must make a course correction.<\/p>\n So often we hear people complaining about what a wicked world we live in. They say it is simply too hard to be virtuous. \u201cEveryone is doing it,\u201d they rationalize. I see all of the temptations you face. I agree, armies of filth do surround us. We do not need to be their victims. We can each decide for ourselves ways to safeguard our virtue\u2014ways to keep us going in the right direction. There is no sin that is worth the price you have to pay for it. Determine right now to put on the whole armor of God and neither retreat into iniquity nor surrender to vice. In our world today, what are you and I going to do to stay clean?<\/p>\n You think about what you can do, and while you are thinking, I will offer a few suggestions. First, dress modestly and neatly. How we adorn ourselves has so much to do with how we think and feel, and how we make others think and feel in our presence. President Harold B. Lee taught:<\/p>\n Do not underestimate the important symbolic and actual effect of appearance. Persons who are well groomed and modestly dressed invite the companionship of the Spirit of our Father in Heaven and are able to exercise a wholesome influence upon those around them. Persons who are unkempt and careless about their appearance, or adopt the visual symbols of those who often oppose our ideals, expose themselves and persons around them to influences that are degrading and dissonant. Outward appearance is often a reflection of inward tendencies.<\/i> [Teachings of Harold B. Lee<\/i> (Salt Lake City: Bookcraft, 1996), 220]<\/p>\n We can ask ourselves, \u201cDoes the way I dress encourage others to think good, righteous thoughts or base, ignoble thoughts?\u201d Consider how we would feel if we were to meet the Savior today. Would He be pleased with how we have chosen to adorn our body? Let us be willing to take a righteous stand and look like it, too!<\/p>\n For women and men alike, modesty is a building block of virtue. Why? Because our bodies are sacred gifts from God that actually give us power over Satan. Satan never has had nor ever will have a body, and he would like nothing more than to have us underestimate this gift. When we wear clothing that is unseemly or too tight, that exposes or otherwise belittles the sacredness of our bodies, we play with fire. And sometimes the scars of even a small burn mar our souls for a long, long time. Back away from the fire and head in the right direction.<\/p>\n Can you imagine what could happen in this casual world if all<\/i> our students made a determination to represent the Lord\u2014and to look like it, too! I wonder if you realize how many world leaders visit this university and look to it as an example.<\/p>\n Let me suggest another safeguard of virtue that will help you to head in the right direction. Be reverent. Especially during sacrament meetings, remember the purpose for which you are there. Listen to the truths being taught. You will be blessed as you go seeking to find solutions to your problems. The sacrament is a time to examine our lives over the past week, ask for forgiveness, and recommit. It is not a time for back rubs, whisperings about last night\u2019s party, or speculations about next week\u2019s dance. During the sacrament and throughout the week, let reverence lead to repentance.<\/p>\n The Savior has made it possible for us to become clean from sin and return to our Father in Heaven. In his conference talk, Elder Scott reflected, \u201cIt must pain Him deeply to see the pointless agony both in this life and beyond the veil that accompany the unrepentant sinner after all He did so that we need not suffer\u201d (\u201cThe Path,\u201d 26). My dear brothers and sisters, if you have not yet felt the cleansing power of the Atonement, do not delay. Do not let yourself get any more bumped or bruised. Yield a broken heart and a contrite spirit. Change directions, if need be. Face the problem and with sincere sorrow and true humility submit to the Lord. He is all-knowing and perfectly loving. He simply could not lead us astray. His promise is sure: \u201cDraw near unto me and I will draw near unto you; seek me diligently and ye shall find me; ask, and ye shall receive\u201d (D&C 88:63<\/a>).<\/p>\n All of which leads to my second suggestion for solving problems. When faced with a problem, humbly ask the question \u201cWhat am I going to do about it?\u201d<\/p>\n