Discovering God’s Plan for You

I am so honored to be speaking to you today for this devotional. Welcome, all of BYU, including BYU–Idaho, BYU–Hawaii, BYU–Pathway Worldwide, and of course everyone here today. Looking around, I can’t believe I was a freshman here at BYU thirty years ago. I really don’t feel like I’m that old. But I am. And that’s okay; I’ve learned a thing or two here. I want to share with you a few things that I learned at BYU—but not necessarily in the classroom. These are things you learn along the way, the hard way, through experience. They were true back in my day and they still hold true today. I hope you don’t mind if I share a few of them to start out my talk.

First, the stairs that connect the Richards Building to upper campus are actually worse than they look. I still hope that they’ll become escalators one day. And if you had to walk up those stairs to make it to the devotional today, I hope it will be worth it.

Second, just save yourself all the trouble of trying to be creative with parking on campus and buy a parking pass. Trust me, they check the fifteen-minute parking spots every ten minutes.

Finally, don’t worry. If you happen to get a C- in biology, physical science, and American heritage, congratulations! You too can graduate from BYU.

In all seriousness, it would have been helpful to know those things when I was a freshman. But if I could go back and tell myself anything, it would be “God has a plan for you.” It’s important to realize that there is a divine design for us.

In the October 2017 general conference, Elder Ronald A. Rasband of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles said:

Significant events unfold in the gospel and in the Church that further the kingdom of God on earth. They are not by accident but by God’s plan. . . .

Likewise, events and associations unfold in each of our lives that further God’s work on earth. . . .

The Lord’s hand is guiding you. By “divine design,” He is in the small details of your life as well as the major milestones.¹

He also said, “Our lives are like a chessboard, and the Lord moves us from one place to another—if we are responsive to spiritual promptings. Looking back, we can see His hand in our lives.”²

I would like to take a look back and show you how the Lord has moved me from one place to another. I’d like to share a couple of experiences in hopes that you can reflect on your own lives and recognize the wonderful blessings and design God has in store for you.

Childhood Heroes

I was born in Nuku‘alofa, Tonga. Months after my birth, our family moved to Laie, Hawaii, so my parents could attend BYU–Hawaii. My next three siblings were born in North Shore at the Kahuku hospital. As you can imagine, life was pretty good. I was attending Laie Elementary and enjoying the beautiful weather and amazing people.

We loved BYU sports, especially football! There were players from our neighborhood on the BYU football team and a dozen other Pacific Islanders on the roster and on the coaching staff. They looked like me and they spoke like me. I followed them and the team as their biggest fan. BYU football was rolling in that era, with innovative offense, complementary defense, and impactful special teams led by the legend LaVell Edwards.

Unfortunately, my life was disrupted when my parents decided to split and divorce. Life was in complete disarray for the next two years. My siblings and I were separated and moved around to different family members. My grandpa, uncles, and aunts all took turns having us in their homes, but nothing was stable. I rotated through living in cities in California, Utah, and Hawaii, never spending more than six months in one spot. I attended many new schools, which made it really hard to make friends. I missed living in the same home as my siblings. During this time, my parents were still trying to figure out their plans with life and college. I missed them. I missed my family and my life. Dealing with divorce in a household is difficult, which, unfortunately, some of you may know through experience. I was broken, and I didn’t understand what was happening. I questioned everything and often blamed myself. I was lost and desperate for answers that never came.

Eventually, my father decided it was time for me and my siblings to live together with him in Utah. I was attending Cascade Elementary in Orem, and it was my fourth-grade year. At this time, the BYU football team was the only thing that brought joy in my young life. It happened to be 1984, the undefeated national championship year. I felt like God answered all my prayers every week for every game. I remember specifically asking Heavenly Father to bless the players and their health, especially Robbie Bosco, because he was always limping for some reason.

When the school announced that the national champions were coming to visit Cascade Elementary, it felt too good to be true. The BYU football players and coaches were amazing. They took turns speaking to the entire school. Afterward, they signed autographs and took pictures. They also participated in different activities and games. I was amazed at their presence and their kindness, as they interacted and laughed with the students and teachers.

Although it was exciting that they were there, I was still sad. I had no confidence and very low self-esteem. I was in a lot of pain: I missed my home. I missed Laie, Hawaii. I missed my friends. I missed my mom. So I sat on the side, satisfied to just watch from a distance.

One of the players noticed me on the side and motioned to me to come join them. I made sure it was me he was motioning to, and then I quickly shook my head no. He then started walking toward me. I froze. This was a big-time player. In fact, he was my favorite player. I didn’t know what he wanted—and why was he coming to talk to me? He asked me a couple of questions and did most of the talking for a quick minute. Before he left to go rejoin the group of students and players, he gave me a hug. It was different than I had ever felt before: I felt warm, and I felt safe. During the embrace, he said, “Everything is going to be fine. I love you and God loves you.” I had heard the words “everything is going to be fine” or “everything is going to be okay” probably a thousand times before, but this was the first time I actually believed them. My heart was full of joy and love. That hug fixed something in me that was broken, and during that hug, I decided that I would play football for BYU and be just like that player, Vai Sikahema.

Vai Sikahema wore the number 23 at BYU and played running back and kick returner, and I wanted to be just like him. Ten years later, as a BYU freshman in 1994, I wore the number 23 in his honor and played running back—just like him—to show my appreciation to him for having such an impact in my life. He became the first Tongan to play in the NFL, and he had a fantastic career as an All-Pro returner. Elder Sikahema is currently serving as a General Authority Seventy for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Years later, I asked him if he remembered this moment. To my surprise, he didn’t specifically remember meeting a shy nine-year-old at Cascade Elementary in Orem, Utah. But to me it was everything! He was “responsive to spiritual promptings.” As Elder Rasband reminded us, “The Lord’s hand is guiding you. By ‘divine design,’ He is in the small details of your life as well as the major milestones.” For Elder Sikahema it was a small detail; but for me, it was a major milestone.

Can you imagine how I feel now as I watch our players interact and connect with young people? It has to be more than just football, especially here. In October 2013, President Russell M. Nelson declared: “Your Heavenly Father has known you for a very long time. You, as His son or daughter, were chosen by Him to come to earth at this precise time, to be a leader in His great work on earth.”³ This is one my favorite parts of my job: I get to coach great leaders.

Adulthood Trials

My beautiful and visionary wife, Timberly, has a favorite quote from President Ezra Taft Benson that has become a theme for our life together: “Men and women who turn their lives over to God will [discover] that He can make a lot more out of their lives than they can.”⁴

I learned this firsthand after I graduated from BYU and focused on a possible professional career. I trained really hard and performed well at the NFL workouts and pro day. I signed a contract as a free agent fullback for the Cincinnati Bengals. It was everything I had wanted since I was a boy. I was in the NFL, ready to live the dream in Cincinnati. The setup was actually better than anything I could have imagined. Even though I was known as a fullback, I had learned how to long snap during college with the hope that it would help increase my chances at the next level—and it did.

On report day, I met with the head coach, who informed me that I would need to provide depth and competition as both fullback and a long snapper. Everything was going my way, and it felt like all my plans were lining up perfectly. I was full of appreciation and gratitude. It was happening!

Before going to bed that night, I knelt down and thanked God for everything. I thanked Him for the blessings and even the struggles I had endured during my playing days at BYU: the three major surgeries followed by rehab, the strength to play through the pain and the hurt, the knowledge I gained from all the coaches, and the fact that I was able to play in fifty games at BYU. I was full of gratitude. Now living in Cincinnati, I was the healthiest I had been in a long time, ready for my first practice. I thanked God for his guidance and ended my prayer by saying, “Heavenly Father, I trust you. Whatever is best for me, let it happen. I’m ready to do so much good with this gift and this opportunity.”

The next morning, I woke up sore, which was normal because of the back surgery I’d had three years before. But today felt different. My body was not responding like normal, making it more difficult for me to move. I compare it to having your foot fall asleep, but it was affecting both my legs and my lower back. In a panic, I tried to warm up. I took a hot bath and stretched but something was definitely wrong. The feeling wasn’t going away.

It was the first day of practice. I remember pleading with my body to respond and desperately asking God to help me. In pain, I went to the football facility and attended meetings and eventually practice. I was doing my best to hide the pain I was experiencing in my lower back and legs, but it wasn’t working. It was obvious to the trainers and coaches that something was wrong. Not long after practice started, they took me into the training room for an evaluation and then later to the hospital for tests and an MRI. There I sat in the hospital room—alone, confused, and nervous. Eventually, the team doctor walked in followed by the general manager—never a good sign. I was told that my back was in such horrible shape from my preexisting injury that continuing to play would put me at risk of permanent damage. My football career was over. I was forced into retirement, never to get another opportunity. My dream had ended before it had even started.

A short time later I was in my hotel room, still in shock. As reality set in, I started to speak out loud to God. I was angry with Him. I said things like, “Are you kidding me?”, “What just happened?”, “When I said, ‘I trust you’ and ‘whatever is best for me, let it happen,’ this is not what I meant!”, and “I told You I was going to do so much good with this gift and opportunity! I was going to make You and everyone so proud! It was going to be amazing.” I was mad—you’ve been there.

It was one of the most frustrating moments of my life. I felt lonely, abandoned, and distraught. I was broken—again.

Then all of a sudden, I felt this warmth that was very familiar. It was the same feeling I’d had as a nine year-old-boy getting hugged by my favorite football player, but this time it felt like a hug from the Savior and His angels, saying, “Everything is going to be fine. I love you and God loves you.” I was healed immediately—not physically, but spiritually and mentally. My anger quickly went away, and my goal now was to find God’s plan for me. Because if playing football in the NFL wasn’t it, then there must be something better.

“Okay, Heavenly Father,” I said, “I’m ready. I’m sorry for the things I said, but I trust You. Let’s go.”

The next fifteen years were full of highs and a few lows as I tried to keep my trust in Him. I made it through the lows, and the highs were amazing. I became a loving husband, a doting father, a more appreciative son, a kinder brother, and a more empathetic friend. And I coached a little football too. I learned so many lessons that gave me the tools and mindset I needed for the next design. He was right. For me, this is definitely something better!

Then on December 19, 2015, I spoke out loud to God again, “Are you kidding me? What just happened?” I got my dream job. The dream job I never knew I always wanted. But God knew. He knows!

President Benson was right:

Men and women who turn their lives over to God will [discover] that He can make a lot more out of their lives than they can. He will deepen their joys, expand their vision, quicken their minds, strengthen their muscles, lift their spirits, multiply their blessings, increase their opportunities, comfort their souls, raise up friends, and pour out peace. Whoever will lose his life to God will find he has eternal life.⁵

The Highlights

So here it is: You’re going to experience adversity and difficult times. You’re in it—congratulations! You’re seeking the divine design set for you. If you get your heart broken, good for you! That means you’re a step closer to finding true love. If you’re struggling in school, awesome! That means you’re pushing yourself through some discomfort and learning new skills. If you’re struggling financially, that’s okay. It means you’re learning how to budget and will be thankful and humble when more compensation arrives. And if you didn’t get the job, that only means that there’s something better waiting for you. God knows that good times are ahead. Your highlights are coming.

In football, the highlights of the games are so exciting to watch. They become historic and legendary. They are also etched in your memory. You remember where you were during that time. Whether you played in the game, watched in the stands and stormed the field, or watched and listened on TV or radio, these highlights become part of your life. They never get old, and you could watch them on repeat for eternity. They remind you of the feeling you had right at that moment.

Speaking of highlights, a couple of years ago at a BYU athletics fireside, I spoke about the ultimate highlight of Jesus Christ and His ministry. He healed the sick and afflicted, He brought sight to the blind, He fed thousands with a few loaves of bread and some fish, He calmed the stormy sea, He raised the dead, He walked on water, and He performed other miracles. He was the ultimate teacher and peacemaker. He taught parables: the laborers in the vineyard, the lost sheep, the good Samaritan, the prodigal son, and others. He taught us to love God and to love one another. He showed love in everything He did, and we continue to learn from Him and His example.

However, it is through Christ’s pain and suffering that we all benefit the most. In His moment of anguish, even He sought the will of the Father “saying, Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done” (Luke 22:42). And then “there appeared an angel unto him from heaven, strengthening him. And being in an agony he prayed more earnestly” (Luke 22:43–44). God knows.

In our most painful moments in life, we literally have someone who knows exactly what we’re going through. We are connected to Him. And just like Him, we need to seek the design and trust God’s plan for us to overcome any adversity.

God knows. I will echo the encouragement of our president, C. Shane Reese, that God loves underdogs and that we should respond to the promptings of the Spirit and “be the miracle someone else needs.”⁶ It may be something very simple—a small detail—to you but a major milestone for another.

So no matter what any of you are going through right now in your lives, His heavenly angels and earthly angels will be there to comfort, encourage, and hug you, reminding us all that “everything is going to be fine. I love you and God loves you.”

In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

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